Therapy in being heard and understood

I had lunch with my good friend Stephenie yesterday. It embarrasses her when I say nice things about her, so I won’t get too carried away. But I will say that I value her insight and deeply appreciate the candor we share.

She and I are walking a lot of the same lines right now. We face questions with no obvious answers. That means a lot of opportunities for overthinking and resultant self-doubt.

And we’re both, unfortunately, very good at it.

You know what crystallized for me yesterday, though? Whether or not you break any new ground, a little bidirectional sharing with someone you respect and trust is a source of significant solace. I didn’t need answers from Stephenie. That she listened and expressed sincere solidarity was enough.

It enables me to walk away thinking “gee, if she’s asking the same questions, then we’re gonna be OK.”

This feels like something I’ve known intellectually for a while, but that cemented into my spirit yesterday. Should it have sooner? Is it too late in life for this epiphany? Maybe. Happens sometimes. Thank you for the assist, Stephenie.

Have a good weekend.

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